By Melissa Antoinette Garza
I miss real Halloween Specials. They were a staple throughout the 70s and 80s. Character actors, big-named celebrities, funny sketches and killer songs were all thrown together for must-see holiday spectaculars. Nowadays, with the exception of a couple failed attempts at bringing them back and an admittedly funny parody of one with Michael Bolton celebrating, Valentine’s Day, they have disappeared. Well, almost.
Thankfully, most have been made available for purchase. Such is the case, with THE PAUL LYNDE HALLOWEEN SPECIAL, which aired, only once, on October 29, 1976. That was before I was born. I didn’t see this until it was released on DVD back in 2006. Always a Paul Lynde fan, the thought of seeing him ham it up on Halloween was a guaranteed treat; and Lynde doesn’t disappoint.
For those who don’t know Paul Lynde was a flamboyantly fun and catty gent. Whether on BEWITCHED (1964), in BYE BYE BIRDIE (1958) or as a constant on the game show HOLLYWOOD SQUARES (1966), Lynde’s humor and sarcastic winks to the camera made him one of the most memorable comedians of that generation.
It’s important to note that Lynde became famous in the late 50s. He was a gay man, who lived during a time when PSAs were put on television condemning homosexuality in the most vitriolic and slanderous of manners. There was zero support for celebrities, who came out of the closet back then. Still, like a goddamn rebel rock star, he made sure that those watching knew what was going on. Remaining closeted became a gimmick that worked, and he expertly used mannerisms, tone and some daringly funny comments to convey what the powers-that-be didn’t want anyone to hear. His comedy helped the homophobic traditionalists put aside their bigotry to laugh with him. What I’m trying to say is that I love Paul Lynde, and if you don’t, you’re probably a jerk.
The Halloween special begins with Lynde dressed like Santa when his housekeeper (Margaret Hamilton) informs him it’s not Christmas, so he does the only logical thing. He goes thru all the holidays, until the true day is revealed.
When one watches his opening monologue, it’s important to see the differences between his style of comedy and what they try to pass for humor today. This special aired right before an election. He mentions it, but he doesn’t focus on the who, what or why of it. It’s just a short, quick mention, and that’s important. None of the comedy is dated. It’s still resonates, is quirky and because of his genius, it’s timely.
His mostly positive, but Halloween take on the BYE BYE BIRDIE song WHAT’S THE MATTER WITH KIDS TODAY is hilarious. The line “there’s too much Alice Cooper and not enough Alice Faye,” is such a brilliant and fitting line for his character.
Then,brother and sister, Donny and Marie Osmond show up dressed in costume. Donny and Marie were the quintessential, good-two-shoes, of the 70s. They were constantly made-fun of because of their purity and religion, but in the 70s, all was cool. The Osmonds were the cool conservatives, who could hang and trash themselves with a self-deprecating joke or two. It’s just so playful and fun! We really need playful and fun, now!
Hamilton, plays double duty, reprising her role as The Wicked Witch. When Lynde comes across the witch and her sister Witchiepoo (Billie Hayes), there’s more comedy gold. Then, he meets the third witch, Miss Halloween who is portrayed by the exquisite, comedy icon, Betty White. Once again, the jokes land marvelously and everyone brings their A game.
Next ,we see Paul Lynde as a trucker in a white, studded , leather suit fully accessorized with a hat and gloves. In this delightful ensemble that creates a vision of the anti-Rob Halford, he talks over a CB radio about his female fiance. Well, the other trucker is engaged to the same woman, who is, no other than 70s glam girl, HAPPY DAYS, Pinky Tuscadero (Roz Kelly). This is another silly and crazy skit. I love that Lynde wore the most elaborate outfit in the bit where he’s fighting another man for the hand of a lady. I just like to think that was a big ‘Fuck You’ to all those who had tried to change him. Lynde was famous for being Lynde. Despite all the pressure, he let America know who he was, and we loved him for it and he will always be remembered and revered because of it.
KISS is rocking with a killer performance of GET UP GET DOWN. Gene Simmons irritates the hell out me, but Paul Stanley, Ace Frehely and Peter Criss are still rock Gods, in my opinion. Even Simmons has presence. I just think he’s a gross douche, and you know someone sucks if they’re a guy in make-up and I’m not taken in. On a positive note, I do adore the music. KISS and Halloween go together like a phantom in a park, in other words, very nicely.
Next, Lynde shows up as Lawrence of Arabia (Paul Lynde) who kidnaps Cecily Westinghouse (Florence Henderson) who isn’t the least bit interested, at first. This is another great sketch and also has a brief appearance from comedy legend Tim Conway. I know his health is suffering, and I send him good vibes. He’s a treasure, who brought and continues to bring the world so much joy.
After a quick funny sketch where the witches steal Lynde’s punchlines, Florence Henderson returns to sing OLD BLACK MAGIC with dancers hamming it up with wigs and costumes in the background.
From there, Peter Criss returns. The song BETH is one of my faves. Criss in make-up, with his shaggy long hair, sitting at the piano in a sequence number is an amazing thing to watch. Full disclosure, he’s my favorite KISS band member and, subsequently, one of the major reasons that I dislike Gene Simmons. I don’t think Criss gets the credit he deserves because Simmons demands it all. It’s so odd. When I see Simmons, I get so irritated. On the other hand, when I see Criss, I get giddy. Yeah, what can I say? I’m a Catman girl.
Lynde does a quick intro with the band, and then the crew jumps into KING OF THE NIGHT TIME WORLD. Damn, these songs are great! I really want a time machine to go back to the 70s and live there.
Lastly, we have everyone, back on stage, for a rendition of DISCO LADY and then to close the show Lynde emerges as his dashing and charming self. He’s so likable and ends the whole production with a sweet, sincere, Mr. Rogers-esque farewell. He just makes you feel good about yourself and good about humanity. We need his energy in this universe!
Track this baby down. The cameos are amazing. In fact, there are several I didn’t mention or focus on, but they are still memorable and great.
PAUL LYNDE’S HALLOWEEN SPECIAL is available on DVD and available for streaming via AMAZON. It’s a fun and bizarre trip that will get you into the Halloween mood like no other.
Scared Stiff Rating: 10/10
